Holidays depress me and being alone doesn't help. There is one I barely see and one who has someone else. I hate how I feel right now.

I Start to think too much and it all goes downhill

I am not sure of anything anymore. I am confused and lost. I am not sure who to believe or what to believe. Am I just making this all up in my mind or is it really happening? As if I don't have enough other things to worry about that are on my mind, I worry about what is around me... and you. You tell me not to worry, but I can't help it. Since that very first day, there is something about you. Something special. I can't help it because I care. You know that I do. I always have. I wish you could understand that. So many people use people and, like me, have a hard time trusting and believing when people are honest and caring. I guess we all have our demons, you have yours and I have mine. Mine are in my past, yours are in your present. Please understand that I care and always will. I know you may not trust others, but I understand the pain. And if you find that I am no longer attractive to you, I will do what it takes to get back to being pretty in your eyes.

When u have been hurt b4, it is so hard to trust, which is why i figure u found someone else.

Have u been so mad u want to scream?

I know that I am not a model or stick thin. I am sorry that I have let you down. Thank you for reminding me how ugly I really am.

I think I will just give up. It's obvious that I am not important at all. WHY BOTHER!!!!

Feel fat and gross. Now I'm sick too. Might as well add insult to injury. I REFUSE to buy new clothes! Fat is lonely!

I looked in the mirror this morning and I hate myself - fat and ugly!!!