27 December 2013


I have a question...
Do people pick out and focus on other peoples flaws because they, themselves, are insecure?

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26 December 2013

pain to power... good or bad

I have a problem.
I take something that has caused me pain and hurt, stewed on it, dwelled over it, and then used the festered anger to drive a power.
I use it to make myself do things. To force me to suck it up. To push myself to limits... healthy, safe, or not.
I can't explain it but its pain that lingers inside with nowhere to go. I use it to drive me, to push me, to fuel me.
Am I the only one who has these driving forces?

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I want to be happy
but sometimes its hard.
I feel lost and alone
Not sure where to turn.
Sometimes you just can't
seem to trust anyone
Because when its good for them
They will turn on you in a heartbeat.
So much for happy...

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wind from your sails

Have you ever felt like things are going well but suddenly....woosh.... things are not what they seemed. Why is it that its more than okay for one person but not for someone else? Its amazing how seniority can cause the winds of change. I guess in business it happens. But really? I guess I can just sit quietly and mind my own business... but I will catch hell for that too.

Just stressed. Sorry. Had to vent!

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09 December 2013

wanna be a kitty cat

I just ate lunch. I've got a snuggly sweater on... now give me a spot where the sun is pouring through the window and I am all over this "curl up in a ball and take a nap" thing!!!!

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01 December 2013

holiday anxieties.... again

Thanksgiving has come and gone and, once again, my mood is down.

I have trouble with these holidays and they seem to bring me down.

I am confused.

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